Need/Love

People sing all kinds of songs to make money, to vent their feelings on a variety of issues, to identify with a certain thing or group, to stand out as an individual...and in some crazy way to some how make others happy or comfort them in their time of grief or need...

Need...I need you in my life, you are the air that I breathe, I can't live without you, I'm so lost without you..need, need, need.

Is this the truth? Will I suffocate, will I die, what exactly is "lost"? Need is relative. As the saying goes nothing is irreplaceable.

Time heals wounds and broken hearts. The pain of losing a loved one will be dulled over time. In every end there is a new beginning. Every dark night gives way to light.

Do you really need what you think you need or is it just some sort of characterization to let others know that you love them?

I don't need my wife but I love her. Whatever she does can be done by someone else but I prefer and am happy she is the one doing it for me. Likewise I know she doesn't need me. Love is more important than need. Love and need is not the same thing. Love is giving while need is taking.

I love my daughter......

Tuesday Morning...

A flickering light, a moving blind, a constant whirring of the AC Unit. The beeping of a Black Berry, the scraping of finger nails across the keyboard of a laptop in an irregular pattern. An orange cup.

So much to do but I don't know where to start. Distractions, distractions, distractions...

Oblivion

The dust has settled, history was created, the fruits of our appeal to consciousness are now in its bearing season. The dawn of a new era has lost it's luster, life goes on.

For some, its victory. For others, nothing has changed. Yet the majority will say that things have taken a turn for the worse. Everyone is right in their minds, in their eyes. Everyone speak from their hearts...mostly...

However, for people like me, there is sadness, there is disenchantment, there is a loss of purpose. You see, we put our hands to the wheel, we openly took no side, we questioned the establishment, we asked the hard questions.

We made enemies on all sides...

Now its time for us to be returned to storage room of oblivion, where all the dark, meaningless souls reside. Now it is time for us to disappear, to invisibly walk this land, to burden ourselves with the load of this place, silently observing and gnashing our teeth, biting our lips letting our hearts burn...

We await the time for the door of oblivion to be reopened to let us have free reign once again. To channel the anger, hurt and ideals from the immediate past into words so sharp and powerful that they actually determine the outcomes of battles and wars...

Be not afraid for we wait in the shadows...

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You know this thing is creeping me out a bit.

Who in Russia want to look at a blog from a little known country halfway around the world?

I'm just a bit curious.

Is it possible for you guys to leave a comment so I know who makes up a large part of my audience?

Well this is something that came back to bite me in the ass...

Originally posted in March this year - I did not follow my own advice, I allowed myself to be drawn in.

Velvet Revolution????

It seems everyone in Guyana is in overdrive as general elections kick into high gear. The PPP, PNC, AFC, other groups and individuals are stating their cases in the various sections of the media. They can be seen in newspapers; in the editorials, the letters from supposedly real persons, articles and even comic strips, on television and on the internet also. I guess the radio station is quiet because that is government controlled.

Many blogs dig deep for information on their enemies, cars bought in 1990 are being questioned now, homes are being photographed and displayed in the media. These types of antics will increase as elections day approaches; politics is indeed a dirty game. In most cases the one that is least covered in dirt emerges as the victor; this is also subjective as the actions of politicians are interpreted differently by the various heterogeneous groups that coexist in Guyana.

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At this point in my life I could care less with the state of affairs in Guyana, however, I will vote that day but it doesn't matter. Either ways the PPP will win the next elections regardless of whether they play fair .....or not.

So I will continue in my introspection, turn my nose up at the velvet revolution, forget about the Guylines that I never experienced and forget about who stole billions of dollars from the treasury.

I will work hard so that I can provide food for my family, thank God for the many mercies granted to me and live to see another day.

It is not my fight to fight, it is not my road to walk, it is not my line to "toe", it is not my burden to bear. To those of you who intend to be drawn in to this false concept that we need a velvet revolution, good luck and I bid you farewell.

Mirror Image

The still waters of the Essequibo River is not reflective of the wrath of this dangerous beast. Oftentimes it is literally gut wrenching to traverse this deadly passage with its cloudy waters crashing into your vessel as if taunting you to step out and face it or should I say take it like a man. There is no glossy covering, no shimmering reflection of anything, there is just pure evil in its intent to maul and ravage you. It just want to inflict pain and suffering. It does not put on a show, it doesn't care about what you think. It is the one who is in charge. Yet at this time, this beast is resting. It lazily rolls around like a swan engaging in a ritualistic dance. It is here for a show, it mimics the sky; a stunning imitation that seems surreal. It seems to be saying, "who me? I wouldn't hurt a fly". It is the perfect example of tranquility transforming into chaos then back again into tranquility. There is no peace. There is no hope. You just wait with bated breath for the inevitable change. This is no show of weakness, not even a show of meekness. It is resting, re-energizing itself for the onslaught that will happen in a few hours time. This is the nature of a wolf in sheep's clothing. This is the hidden nature of man...

Simple Life

This photograph was taken in Canal #2 Polder, West Bank Demerara, Guyana. It may seem like a painting, however, it is not, it is yet another byproduct of false labeling as so foisted upon us by the Chinese. The so-called 8 megapixels yielded this quality of photograph. 

Anyways back to the painting ... I mean photograph. 

In times like these in Guyana, where the order of the day is to patten yourself off of the Americans; based on what is shown on television. Which is false by the way. I was told that many of the moral values of Americans are fairly intact and its only the rich and famous and some vagabonds that engage in such lascivious and immoral behaviors. We can probably label the rich and famous as vagabonds then? 

It is quite peaceful to look upon such beauty, such greenery as a cow lazily eats the natural food placed before her by God. To look at the vast expanses of land devoid of noticeable development, no concrete jungle, just pure and simple agriculture, simply practiced.

Standing in solitude, in the background, but in the center of this photograph is a majestic silk cotton tree. As a forester, standing more that a mile away, I could still spot this king. This tree might have been planted by the Dutch or could be an offspring of one such tree. Nevertheless it still stands, hopefully no one will place a chainsaw at its base anytime in the future in the name of development ... or poverty. 

I gaze at the sight before me, thinking of simpler times, of times when I had no responsibilities, when I was free. Free to do what I what. However, such times are no more and I'm grateful for that. Honestly...

Yet I wish I can retreat to places like these, once in a while. To refresh myself  and thoughts so I can face my responsibilities with an invigorated mind.